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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网3 g' p/ M: q* T/ l* P, {" V
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。9 P' q- }0 ]: L4 m3 T
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第% v8 g/ {1 m' n' d9 h/ K' ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">51 y! h' ^6 }5 Z0 M. h `3 c( R
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) U$ C+ A+ U5 A' ?' b- H9 m$ Z- amso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：! `* H3 J; w. }mso-font-kerning:0pt">“4 e. Q1 M/ b, ~( V2 ?- c8 d, i
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：" S' R* w, h! t' y. `
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。# `) J3 T( y n. W+ bcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">” u j+ v8 l2 N0 U" g7 E6 L0 E& z" C6 B+ VTahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;* z8 a3 \1 W( K, G+ J \4 r* S3 F9 K8 B
mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：6 H! K* ^$ B6 `5 ^9 Lmso-font-kerning:0pt">“# A# H, |/ S0 e
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？1 K. M7 a" t1 H& H9 C) C( x3 Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">” q4 h0 |5 A |4 g/ u% f( h- n
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9 n6 K7 ~2 d' M; I9 Smso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：% J( @0 \! o k' [mso-font-kerning:0pt">“+ ~/ [+ C& w& T2 V' kmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;- t$ Y% R, _* w; q* s/ u
mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。! ~) }* T) | q3 G+ n. Jcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。4 l P3 [. a% f$ a. Ymso-font-kerning:0pt">
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. o! D l+ U! ?0 P ?mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：: B2 E+ l" V: B# F" N$ G5 c! S! \7 T
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。1 D5 S4 `1 e% ] o e2 @
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/ y: ?( {1 F( c- o3 w+ D, emso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：( ?% C5 K# n+ f ?1 ~. m" I6 }4 s
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3 r$ Z2 w! C% VTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。; n% G c- G3 Z" bmso-font-kerning:0pt">": u( a3 B" l8 S" H& d) c* x
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢& I' k" q& P$ s; v$ O
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：% k5 W5 u/ M1 S) w6 w( _mso-font-kerning:0pt">"0 ^' m" L9 U) j+ Y3 u1 Y/ B1 K5 pfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;% W$ ]$ w9 i! [9 i1 L0 R
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。! r. S/ T+ ]9 E' [4 L
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2 c. W* X" i& Z. @/ Pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是( \* y2 p% r9 j% K9 l5 _" c; F
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6 r: ^3 e- @( F, ~: Lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违! O5 f$ C9 ~) q: `$ s' l10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 Q3 F1 V1 f# V B6 {! v. ?) l. A
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/ [$ r. G7 Y3 y" {( imso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得, ~0 M* N c7 Y2 n4 h
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲9 N0 m; k/ X' N; Kmso-font-kerning:0pt">“; D/ ? ~! h2 x; x- h( @* Y' K, S
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, ~* ^2 W; l: u( t9 O" }$ Q9 tmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，. H9 c) O ~5 I
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。6 v3 `; g5 u/ E9 W( e& u* r
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5 o: q7 ]2 k4 O1 \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。9 m1 O- C9 C% a# L6 Z" t
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9 G5 c7 V$ p5 q# b% b9 G7 Y6 STahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义$ \$ z: M. b- e' Y8 m
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9 q% x5 A, U w$ r. j2 N* uTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！# d4 ^3 c9 D; v3 N, M. I! ]" ^
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) I9 E/ ^! o! k2 D8 D- j9 D M4 A6 xmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。8 U5 ^2 h" l# Imso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述: \0 d$ r7 ^+ k* m2 m# f8 f
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$ ^- l N0 V `mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊. L- z& o7 S' Gmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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' u; \: g' V. b7 I) {Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。8 F( X- S( I% y) ~3 qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。* O: v( e$ F8 [6 W& I
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2 U: v$ J0 S; q, Umso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。/ n/ P% @4 w6 b5 P7 zmso-font-kerning:0pt">——/ W `$ T! W; w; q9 q) \: m8 dfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
, o+ M" m: A, O+ @5 |( umso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：. ]& V- ?( r7 Z+ E4 i
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。" p- U' r3 s8 H8 Tmso-font-kerning:0pt">”7 ]: t! M1 M: t5 ?5 I2 `font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
) a& V7 t8 D/ _2 Omso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个+ |( L, l: ~, J4 P7 `2 s
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) `- ] p2 q0 Z) mmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬% o' _2 f7 p1 _3 C6 A$ Q
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1 V- S, ^/ ?% {/ f5 p; Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为: j9 v/ L: d" {$ O6 tmso-font-kerning:0pt">“7 Y0 W3 A( Y" t: | Wfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
5 ^" p# l7 O8 W0 \+ F# pmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道) m; }, s; u7 c; B+ ]4 N3 Imso-font-kerning:0pt">”: ~# X) _2 A$ W5 P4 {9 u" f. p% C. h5 d
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5 m: v8 B. F7 _4 W3 t4 ~% W1 @1 r5 bmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。9 U) L% d8 b8 }1 ?
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$ y" V1 y* N, JTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">舍得：; D+ `3 a& l/ G0 s/ Q6 Z) h$ r
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3 t! O3 e- e) a8 q( v5 h) bTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的' X6 M2 @9 s% E5 b* P4 w1 k$ t* c
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" }/ l: [, M; |' dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思# n( E% }8 U5 V- Y& Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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